The Westminster bubble has spent their time gnawing on its own scandals, but the real story, the genuine barometer of where British campaigning is heading, lay hundreds of miles away in the rain‑soaked streets of Gorton and Denton. This is a constituency split down the middle, a place where two political climates exist side by side: Manchester’s youthful, diverse wards on one hand, and Tameside’s older, more traditional communities on the other.

Electoral Calculus claims this seat might even fall to Reform, projecting them at 32 per cent to Labour’s 22.6 per cent and the Greens not far behind on 23.3 per cent. The predicted probability of victory is Reform 61 per cent, Labour 21 per cent and Greens 18 per cent, turning what was once a Labour stronghold into a three‑cornered brawl.

Some men are born to lead, some achieve leadership, and some spend their lives circling the car park, prodding Ford Fiestas with the toe of their shoe. Andy Burnham, Mayor of Greater Manchester, has perfected the latter art. If there is a political equivalent of loitering outside a dealership with no intention of buying, Burnham has cornered the market.

From his early New Labour days, he presented himself as Labour’s wholesome everyman, football scarf draped, hair floppy, forever reminding us he was “from Leigh”. PR immaculate, optics perfect. Behind the grin, though, his ministerial stints produced more cautious nudges than roaring accelerations.